Here are three ways to recognize and overcome the feeling of being lonely:
1. Recognize loneliness for what it is.
What is loneliness? It is an enemy, a disease that eats away happiness, alienating you from all that is worthwhile in life, and it sours and thickens the spirit. Calling it your “friend” or accepting it as a cross you must bear is deadly to your peace of mind. Wallowing in your misery brings out the most acute feelings of loneliness, feeding it by keeping yourself in that state, sometimes leads to a point that it becomes enjoyable. Watch out when this happens. It is a sign of danger — not only to you but to others around you as well.
2. Distinguish between loneliness and being alone.
These are not the same. Loners are not necessarily lonely. Some of the most creative and productive people find it necessary to be alone much of their time. They have learned to use their solitude creatively. Fact is, we need periods of solitude. It is where we generate the physical and spiritual reinvigoration from our crowded schedules. King David, the psalmist of the Bible also writes about this saying, “He leadeth me beside still waters. He restoreth my soul.” All of us experience loss in one way or another. It is our choice if we let grief stay only for a temporary episode of our life or allow it to become a crippling disease to rot our life away.
3. Make yourself useful.
Instead of wallowing in a pool of misery, find time to make yourself and your life useful to others. There are dozens of ways in which you could help. Go out into the community, find a church, offer your services, and your talents. Join a cause. You will be surprised at how you gain fulfillment in serving others, in making others smile, in being an inspiration to live. You’ll soon find out that your former state of self pity is just all about being too concerned about yourself, when you see that there is a whole world out there, and humanity is just as needy as you are. Find in yourself something you could offer to make this world a better place.
Now get up and find your purpose!